October 11: Surgery and School Decisions

Thank you all for the mid-week support for Sarah’s surgery. It helped me feels supported and less anxious. Carl said Sarah handled everything beautifully. He was with her when she went under the anesthesia, but he said she would have been fine without him. The tooth fairy showed up (for the last visit ever for Sarah!!) with appropriately numerous gifts. Sarah received 2 Kit Kats and 3 books. She didn’t give a fig about the chocolate bars, but eagerly started reading her new books. Somehow the TF knew she would be delighted to own The Monster At The End Of This Book, the sequel with Elmo, and Pete the Cat and the Perfect Pizza Party. Two out of the three books had recently been featured on “Mr. Greg Reads” and Sarah often likes to have her own copy so she can follow along and do Ms. Sarah reads. When Sarah had her Facetime session with G, she read Goodnight Moon to him. It is so earnest and adorable. 

When I was tucking Sarah in at night after her surgery she asked if she could have another surgery the next day. I asked what part of the experience she was wanting to have again. She said, “to hang out on the hospital bed with Dad.” That is so sweet. I reminded her she can hang out on a bed with him anytime, without needing to have surgery or be in a hospital. 

Amy enjoyed being a witch for much of last week, but her dried Play-Doh wands kept breaking. I decided she needed a wand that wouldn’t break so a wand and cauldron should be arriving soon. Overall things are going well for Amy, but she definitely struggles if she is still doing school work at 5pm. Then everything feels too hard. So I think I need to nudge more firmly to get her started earlier in the day, even though she resists my nudges. Every morning she still needs time to pack her backpack, don her witch hat, and run around the block to get to witch school. 

Decisions about remote schooling continue to be challenging every time we have to make a choice. Amy’s school will have an option for kids to be in person to do their virtual learning. There was strong encouragement for parents to only opt for that if it was really needed. So Amy will continue at home and I didn’t even tell her about the choice. Sarah will also continue at home through the next quarter, but we know that she will probably be one of a very few doing so. The wonderful thing is that her school hasn’t had any cases of covid-19 so we are considering having her return at the end of January. From talking with other parents in general, I know I am not the only one to question all of my decisions all of the time.

I hope your decisions are feeling clear and easy. I just remembered the wise advice from a friend of mine. If you don’t know the answer easily, then maybe you are asking yourself the wrong question. As usual I keep asking what the right decision is and what I should do. What if I ask “what will I feel most comfortable with? What nurtures my entire family the most at this moment?” That is easier. I know those are underlying my should/right questions anyway, but it is easier to feel the answer if I reword things. So, may you easily ask yourself a helpful question.