While the schools haven’t sent out official notices of continued closure, it is impossible to imagine that they will open in a week. There is just no way. Except for the essential businesses related to food and health, all of PA is closed by order of the governor. Restaurants are permitted to provide food for take-out only. I was able to get some groceries delivered because we were running out of fresh produce, but it took days to get a delivery time slot and half of what I requested was unavailable. I think that there is a very real possibility that I will homeschool through May. That feels surreal and daunting. In an act of hope I completed the forms for Sarah to attend school in the fall. I pray that things are remedied enough by then.
Play dates are not permitted. Amy has done some FaceTime calls with her best friend. Sarah had a virtual piano lesson that went surprisingly well. The girls also did a FaceTime session with Sc, each with art supplies so they could draw together. Sarah had her usual time with G virtually, yet they still conspired to open a window together so Sarah’s curtains would blow in the breeze. She had been so focused on the curtains that I closed the window slightly so she could focus more on G. That didn’t work, but what did work was when I left the room and he could assist her with suggestions. Once she realized she had a partner in crime she was hooked into her connection with G.
I am surprised by how well it is working for Carl to work from home. He joins us for lunch and then “comes home” for dinner. We took a couple after dinner walks as a family and that felt great.
Homeschooling is challenging. Being on my own with the girls daily with no help during the work day is hard. Receiving materials from the schools actually makes it feel much harder and more stressful than it was the first couple of days when I did whatever I wanted, but still felt like I was hitting the academics. Now we have forms and activities and new sites to navigate and I often feel totally overwhelmed. My dad used to teach third grade and so he sent some math worksheets that he created. Amy hasn’t done them yet and they don’t count for her school, but they have done wonders for my heart when I needed a boost. They are silly and fun and bring joy to my being. So even if Amy doesn’t do them at all, they have been important tools for this new phase of our lives.
Amy and I had a birthday. It started well with cards and some paper flowers made by Carl. It progressed rather miserably since that was the day I got the email from Amy’s school with the myriad of details that had me wanting to stick my head in the sand. I cried a lot that day. I’m not sure why this all feels as overwhelming as it does, but that’s how it is. Then I wonder how other families are possibly managing when they maybe have a single parent who needs to work either outside the home or from home. My only job now is to feed my family and do home schooling. And that feels hard enough!
Art projects feel mostly easy. Gymnastics used to feel that way until Amy decided things must be exactly a certain way and Sarah isn’t cooperating. I now have Sarah’s materials from school and feel overwhelmed again. Probably the most challenging thing is when I say it is time to do a certain thing and Sarah starts screaming, sometimes without even knowing what the thing is. One morning when I came in to her room to end her reading time she greeted me with, “I don’t want to!” before I had said a word.
It is surreal to be in this moment that we know will be a notable historical moment. Collectively, people around the world are being asked to sew masks for hospital workers. It feels like something from WWI when people needed to sew for the troops. This is a war against a virus and the troops are the hospital workers, on the front line, exhausted, and running out of supplies. The most the rest of us can do is stay home and hope we don’t add to the numbers of people needing intense care.
On the plus side, we are getting more sleep. We have kept bedtime the same as before but now everyone (except the cat and thus also me) sleeps in an extra 30-90 minutes! I don’t know how to use this information to adjust our schedule when things return to some semblance of normal. I can’t make Sarah go to bed at 6:30!
Lots of love to all of you.
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